1/5: Self-worth

One of the things or maybe one of the most important things a person should have with him or her when entering a relationship is a clear view of his worth as a person. A lack of which ultimately leads to that worth being defined by the other party in the relationship. How a person sees himself or a lack thereof dictates how the relationship is going to go and who is going to drag the relationship towards what direction.

When a person loses sight of his worth as a person, even what little shred of dignity he has will be shredded to tiny indistinguishable pieces over the course of their relationship by the very object of his affection. To some, it happens unintentionally. To others, the opposite rings true. And what makes it more sad is that they actually put up with it. They make excuses for the other person despite what terrible treatment they receive. Some do it for fear of their lives. Some do it because they think they will never have anyone love them the same way.

Most people enter relationships thinking that the other person can satisfy the their longings only to come out of the relationship discontent and unsatisfied. They forget that their lovers are nonetheless human and have their own issues, struggles, and needs to deal with.


Self-worth ought not depend on another person’s ability or a lack thereof to appreciate our beings. We must know our value as a person before we expect anyone to treat us with respect and dignity. Only then can we stop putting up with people who do not deserve a space in our lives.

But how do we even define our value as a person? Are there scales in which we can measure ourselves with to know how much we are worth?

This is how we come to know our value: But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)

God, the Creator of Heaven and Earth, sent his Son to die for us– sinners- even while we are living in sin. Even while we did not even think of ourselves in need of saving. The God in Heaven loves us that much.

We can never fathom why.

We can never fathom how.

We can never fathom the depth and breadth of such love.

We can only respond in humility and thankfulness for such love bestowed upon us. The only love that can satisfy the longings of our soul.

It is only when we accept this love that we learn the our value as a person. It is only when we accept this love  that we can love another person rightly.


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