Personal

Giving and Gratitude

One thing I have most likely picked up from my mom is the tendency to expect tangible expression of gratitude in one form or another. Not that I expect great gestures, though that is of course welcome, but somehow I feel entitled to at least even a degree acknowledgment or some sort of thoughtful regard for what I have done.

Just recently I have had a disappointing experience regarding that. Not that I needed a reward or anything but I thought a small recognition would have been warranted. Or sige. Fine. Maskin walay acknowledgment. At least ‘thank you, Jad’ man lang. Pero wala. (Or ok. Fine. No need for acknowledgements. At least ‘thank you, Jad’ would have sufficed. But I got nothing.)

It disappointed me, really. And honestly, I wanted to brood over that. But then I remembered Jesus’ sermon on the mount on giving and although it had a different context, I somehow found the connection between the parable and my circumstance.

Jesus said,

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Which made me wonder, “Who was I doing it for– the good deeds? And more importantly, why?”

“Why do I care so much about this person? Why am I willing to go the extra mile?”

Perhaps the best solution in getting rid of the bitter feelings that comes with entitlement is remembering where the blessings came from. Clue: not from us.

In my prayers when I was younger, I always thanked God for blessing me and my family abundantly. I also asked Him, through His blessings, to make me a blessing to others. In other words, blessed to become a blessing. 

And maybe that’s the point of it all.

No need for rewards.

No need for acknowledgments.

I am simply but a vessel through which God’s blessings flow to others. The pipe need not be praised for whatever it is tasked to carry (although it can be praised for its efficiency it completing its task, but more importantly) rather it is the Source from which whatever flows through the pipe comes from that ought to be praised. 

Blessed to become a blessing.

That’s definitely it.

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